How do I hate thee? Let me count the ways...

When the most recent dirt about Barry Bonds hit (via some good old-fashioned Woodward-and-Bernstein journalism), I was among those who threw on ESPN only to hear very little about the actual story. A true story of a man literally turning himself into a wad of muscle via "medicine"... this is every newsman's dream to break this thing open. So where was the sports network's in-depth coverage?

Leave it to Deadspin to connect the proverbial dots.

Despite his success, Barry is one of the biggest losers in the history of the game. Arrogant, yet a total crybaby, completely unsatisfied with being the best, and unable to do anything with his stardom besides wield it like a battleaxe towards teammates and the media. Ditto for ESPN, minus a few old-school reporters who cash their checks and do their damndest to avoid the beer-sponspored, highlight-free loop that the network has become.

There's still a standing offer of one "Ballston is for Losers" T-Shirt to whoever can submit to me a graph, complete with pictures (or actual measurements) of Bonds' head over time. Bonus points for using throwing in the head of Sammy Sosa for shits and giggles.